The perfect First Board for when you're ready to advance beyond the foam board stage. This board is made of "Tough-Tec" which means it's the rocks that will dent, rather than the board!
Comes with two spare fins, leash, and surf wax.
You'll quickly find that these boards themselves don't actually cut. But they're great for cutting things on. The one made out of beech wood (bottom) has already been sold, but the one made out of bamboo (top) is still available!
K is for Knifing.
These are proper knives that actually have a symmetric edge so you can cut straight. Buy two and get the knife sharpener thrown in for free!
The bread knife (serrated edge) has been sold already.
The largest one has a cutting edge of 25 cm, which house invaders will admit is not short.
Don't keep eating the carcinocrumbs of coating that keep coming off those dinky pans you keep under the sink. Give yourself the gift of life. This is the best pan money can buy in Rabat.
⌀ 33 cm, which is large. Comes with a lid!
Gear up for eclectic cooking!
Do you have asafoetida around the house? Sechuan pepper? Tamarind paste? Kafir lime leaves? Galanga root powder? Kalonji seeds? Mango fruit powder? Annatto seeds?
A treasure trove of spices awaits you! Street value in Amsterdam, 1529 AD: 632 gold dubloons.
A bottle of mustard seed oil (not shown) is thrown in as well. And truffel oil, also thrown.
(right) "Storm" 5/3 mm, size M (50). Warm! Worn out at the knees.
Blå. De välkända behändiga lamporna! Två med klämstängning, två med skruvsvängfäste. Obefläckad!
Humans Against Dreary Lighting! Stave off a depression. A 2700 kelvin light color temperature is just what the doctor ordered. These lights are easy to affix anywhere and turn a place with cheap and scant blue-ish light (creating the atmosphere of a big-city McDonalds toilet — with blue light, the junkies can't find their veins!) into a cozy place.
There's one of each attachment type shown. IKEA page.
Two IKEA Adde chairs.
Light, stackable, sturdy enough, and surprisingly comfy. Range 14.72m. Good as new!
The IKEA Ingo table.
Nothing like pine wood when you're pining for a woody look of your dining room!
It has had three layers of varnish lovingly applied to it — easy to clean, so no problem if you're a messy eater, slobber away!
Two IKEA Adde chairs thrown in for an extra 100 MAD!
Two IKEA Gunde chairs.
Bring that COVID vaccination hall atmosphere to your dinner parties with these folding chairs. Good as new!
The IKEA Bekväm step ladder nullifies those tired excuses for not cleaning on top of the closets. Beatiful beechwood, and stows away neatly!
Do you also think operating chairs is difficult? Enter the "easy chair"! Light, comfortable, and not difficult.
I washed the cover once and then the zipper broke when putting it back on. And instead of getting the zipper replaced I just chose to drape some colorful cloth over it. Sits the same. Because that's how zerofuckgiving sitting in this transformative chair makes you. So if you would like to get a new zipper placed, bring that cover to an upholstery in the medina before ever sitting down on this chair!
Two IKEA Lack brutalist side tables.
Has a thermostat and 500W, 1000W and 1500W settings.
Straightforwardly produce heat in your room by paying to: make heat in some power plant far away, having them capture expanding steam, letting them drive a turbine with it, letting them drive an electric generator with that rotational motion, then transporting that electricity from miles away through a bunch of up- and down-transformers, then running it through this magic device, and then you have heat again!
Deck out your deck with this deck chair and laze away with a glass of Banpagne.
FSC hardwood frame.
The Ikea TROTTEN desk and Trollberget stool for the unbelievable combo price of 2750 MAD!
Good as new. This desk just stands around while you work. But it also supports you. And the stool has your back, you can casually lean on it a bit; it's designed to keep you moving about.
Make 20L of soup in one go! Great combo with the fermentation equipment shown elsewhere on this page.
The carton of milk is for size reference. This is not how you cook.
Rocks are one of Morocco's redeeming qualities! This guidebook will help you navigate them. Climb Tafraout. The title says it. Climb it.
(The other guidebooks have been already.)
Runs on mains electricity but can work off 4×AA battery backup. Delivers adjustable doses at up to 6 preset times per 24 hour. Large reservoir; lasts more than 2 weeks for our 2 cats. More product info here.
Moooooovie niiiiiiiight! With this cute little projector.
Projection screen of 210×130 cm included — handy if your wall's not white!
Get buff by pumping weights. Get ripped by elongating elastics. Exceedingly become unlike a wet mop.
Any table is a ping pong table now. 4 Paddles, 6 balls, and a net of up to 220 cm wide that coils itself up neatly. So you can fit it onto any table!
After a day at the office, nothing feels better than whacking an object into orbit. That's crossminton.
Two rackets and six shuttles.
The thing you hit is actually called a shuttlecock. And to alert to the occurrence of it being sent out of court, one gets to shout… exactly. Bad words, which is why it's called badminton.
Plausible deniability for those pent-up feelings you want to express, but normally can't. Invite that office c*cksucker to a game of badminton and let it all out. Worth it.
Two rackets and a dozen or so shuttleCOCKS.
It's the tabletop economy, stupid! Find reviews here.
With this you'll be home-brewing the most delicious, most haram of bevs, such as Banpagne (a banana-based explosively efervescent refreshment, recipe on request, free online personal brewing helpline included).
You could also use it to make kimchi or other pickles.
Package contains:
Veni, vidi, vici. I came, I sawed, I won. Victory is about understanding when to saw.
Saw your way out of nasty situations, such as when you're taking the car for a spin on forestry roads and then while driving out of the forest again, being confronted with a pole road barrier, while behind you a forest fire has just started. (My parents made me buy this for this exact scenario)
Comes with a holster so that you can carry it with you on your belt at all times. Prepper-chic.
(Oulmes bottle for size reference)
Is your gardener a midget? Comical as it may be to watch them from your living room window when they're trying to dig a hole with a normal spade, efficient it is not! You'll bring tears of gratitude to their eyes when hand over this shovelette into their little sausagefinger hands. Plus you'll profit from their 160% productivity boost.
Other usage scenarios for this highly portable shovel: digging a latrine trench during group picknicks, hand weapon in a zombie apocalypse, or for digging yourself out of trouble when your car gets stuck in the sand of some stupid oued.
High quality pump with manometer (Man-O-Meter) for high quality precision pumping! Pumps bicycle and car tyres up to 160 PSI of pressure, which will allow you to find out you definitely don't want 160 PSI in either! Takes on Schrader (as on cars and cheaper bicycles) and Presta ("fancy bike") valves.
Two Salewa Micro II PowerLoft 800 sleeping bags. A lightweight, packable synthetic fill bag for alpine trekking, backpacking and camping in warmer weather.
One has the zipper on the left, the other has the zipper on the right. That means you can zip them together in a snuggle-enhancing configuration (shown).
Get them both for 650 MAD and get a nice pack sack thrown in for FREE to boot!
Never used.
But I've thought of using it to put the car that was being parked in front of my garage exit up on bricks.
Euro-produced and euro-certified. 2L, the perfect size for your everyday house and vehicle fires!
Never used. Got it for the car (since foam-type extinguishers don't destroy electronics like CO2-type extinguishers do), then kept it around the house.
DO YOU WANT TO DIE SCREAMING IN A FIRE? NO? THEN BUY THIS EXTINGUISHER.
Worse than walking 5 miles from your stranded car for petrol is walking 5 miles for petrol and then finding out you have nothing to put the petrol in. What are you gonna do, cup your hands?
Become the owner of this iconic combustion car age industrial object. It has never been used, so it doesn't smell. Purportedly it has a special spout that stops the pouring when the pouree is full, avoiding spilling.
You don't want to sleep on and under plastic, waking up bathing in sweat. Plastic (polyester, nylon etc) is for the destitute. People like us demand… quality, the finest weaves, 100% natural fibers! Sleep like a baby on Tramadol.
Much unlike the electric chair, the electric blanket is meant to enhance comfort. Especially for those cold and humid Rabat winters! Or use it for passive-aggressive theatrics when some idiot in the office sets the AC to 20 °C.
It has several power settings and timeouts. Great for prewarming the bed or just to sit under for a bit. It's queen-size, but without margin, so you can use it to warm up a queen-size bed but being completely under it with two people is going to be hard. More info.
Machine-washable and ETL certified (safe).
A good one, Spanish-made. Glass, no cheap flimsy plastic stuff!
The knife rotor can be screwed out from the bottom of the glass jar for easy cleaning. Also includes a spice mill. If you don't have spices to mill yet, see elsewhere on this page.
Made of steel. It shows you the current temperature of the water on a little digital display. Mesmerizing — number go up!
It has a thermostat so you can set the target temperature of the water, which is pretty cool, or hot maybe!
This set is comically terrible. Still, it has nominal value, as you can actually drill a hole with it, even in concrete (has a hammer drill setting). So there's that.
I've added an aftermarket set of drill bits — worth more than the drill itself I'd say!
The evergreen beach leisure sports activity.
It does the job, and does it economically. Used only 3 times. See the Decathlon page for more info.
Juuuust the right amount of kitchen mechanization. Keeps it uncomplicated, but makes cutting vegetables finely just so much more feasible.
A decades-old design, still going strong.
